.......lend money to what is apparently a loser!
For some backround: Took a trip to FL last month with friend and her 2 daughters (19 and 18). Had to put the airfare on my credit card since none of them have one. The friends brother has a home down there so lodging was free for all of us. The deal was that friend would pay me for her ticket while one of the daughters would pay for both girls tickets. Mind you this daughter (19)works full time, lives at home, has no mortgage, rent, utilities, car insurance, or car payments! I never heard from her and finally asked my friend what is the deal with S? Am I ever going to see a check, cash, anything? After still not hearing from her I decide to call her up and get her story. She says the usual - I have it, not to worry, I'll be busy working all week. So I say great, drop it off on your way to work this week.
All week I never received a call. So I call her up today (using a different phone so she doesn't recognize the number). This time I hear fear in her voice, like she was caught. So she gives me the usual I'm running off to work, I'm late. Great! I say. Just drop it off on your way. Can't, she says. Running late, taking the expressway, yada, yada. She goes on to say that she'll give it to her mom since a bunch of us meet every Friday night for dinner and drinks. So I ask her if her mother is working Friday night(tomorrow). She says she doesn't know so I say ask her (I could hear my friend talking in the backround so I knew she was around). I hear friend confirm that no, she is not on the schedule Friday night. Great! I say. Give it to your mom to give to me. Then, just for good measure, I ask to speak to her mom. She gets on the phone and we chat for a bit. Before I let her go I CONFIRM that her daughter will give her the money and I will get it from her tomorrow night. Friend was pleasant but changed the subject much, much, too quickly.
Now, I've been patient, diplomatic, generous in every way possible. But, once my chain is yanked I have a REAL SHORT fuse. Right now I'm running all kinds of scenarios in my head as to what can happen: short pay, no pay, friend doesn't show up cause she had to work after all or decided to go elsewhere for dinner (which she kind of slipped in as a possibility).
I've got to keep my cool so how would any of you handle this? Really, I can't imagine having to ask for my own money back! Don't people have any self-respect?
Yes, yes, yes, I know better than to...........
May 24th, 2007 at 10:45 pm
May 25th, 2007 at 12:16 am 1180048602
May 25th, 2007 at 02:49 am 1180057756
May 25th, 2007 at 02:49 am 1180057794
May 25th, 2007 at 04:43 am 1180064590
May 25th, 2007 at 01:50 pm 1180097451
May 25th, 2007 at 03:39 pm 1180103985
I would show up and ask for the money and ask why she doesn't have it if she doesn't. I would tell her you misjudged her, thought she was responsible, right and wrong, yada, yada.... you could make a real difference in her financial life for the future. If she gets away with this, she may think she can get away with this type of behavior in other situations...
May 25th, 2007 at 05:31 pm 1180110665
May 25th, 2007 at 05:51 pm 1180111870
May 25th, 2007 at 10:47 pm 1180129667
As for showing up on the doorstep - I've been over the house but she never came downstairs even though she knew I was visiting.
As for small claims - yes, I'm thinking along those lines but having been in acount payables/accounts receivables (for a manufacturer) I would stand a better chance if I could at least somehow get a check out of this gal. I don't care if it bounces, but I think I need some sort of financial obligation from her apart from my word against hers that the cost of the tickets were a loan and not a gift.
As for the friend - she's weak. Separated, caves into her daughters demands just to be the "good" parent. Has little to no boundaries with them. Despite being a decent person she's a mess and could use counseling but prefers to throw her lot in with "the church". After all, "God is good". I say, "God helps those who help themselves". Just because I don't work, have a personal trainer, etc., doesn't mean I have it easy. Some of you may know and remember my circumstances. It takes long term planning and proper allocation to be able to stop working to take care of an ailing parent along with juggling all the finances/insurances just to make sure everything will last. It always looks alot easier than it really is.
In retrospect, (isn't always in retrospect?) I should have made her sign a promissary note on the spot. That would have been legally binding!
We'll see what happens tonight. Friend is coming out with us.